Mad that is.
I learned something about myself last night that I never knew. I mean, I've known me for almost 24 years now. You'd think I knew all there was to know, but I know not what I didn't know. You get it?
Good. That's the point.
My husband had a fit about having canvas and framed pictures of our baby and our wedding throughout the house and in his mind, pictures of people should not be flaunted all around the house. On the walls should be art. Abstracts, nature, beauty... Things you don't see every day.
I didn't agree. In fact, I thought he was bonkers! I paid good money for those canvases and they dang well better be displayed! I'm taking them down this weekend. (Leaving the ones in frames on the mantle and still displaying others... just not on the walls.)
From now on, the only things on the walls will be art. My art. Bet you didn't see that one coming, eh dear? I thought "baby steps" last night as I gathered my supplies to begin a painting. I intended on drawing water. A lake or a stream? While making gentle strokes and outlining the riverbanks, I began to stress out a little bit about making it perfect. I wanted ripples and waves and icy blue water that you could feel just by looking at it. I wanted perfection.
As I was attempting this work of art, I could feel the fun being sucked out of the project. It was turning into a chore. The sad part is, this is a lot like my life. Not the fun sucker part, I think my life is quite fun. I realized however that it can be funner. (Which is a word by the way.)
I began to think about one of my favorite childhood movies: Alice in Wonderland and the part of the movie where Alice and the Mad Hatter are discussing the sudden realization that the Mad Hatter is indeed mad!
“Do you think I've gone round the bend?"
"I'm afraid so. You're mad, bonkers, completely off your head. But I'll tell you a secret. All the best people are.”
I began to splash and squirt and launch the paint all over the canvas until I was smiling and thinking of nothing other than the fun I was having. I mean, I simply stopped taking it so seriously. I went mad.
This is so easily applicable in my life. My OCD, my type "A" personality, and my need to control things... they were beginning to get in the way of the things that truly mattered in life.
Perfection is in the eye of the beholder (or something like that...). Now you should know: I am by no means an artist. In fact, maybe I am? What is an artist anyway? I don't intend on selling this. In fact, anyone who'd be willing to buy it would be more mad than me! I do however intend on displaying it. Somewhere I'll see it and remember that perfection is not the key to happiness. You can't plan everything and know what each day will bring. Sometimes you just have to sit back and enjoy the ride.